tears

with my tears, what can i do with it? Dropped, wiped. and it's repeatly. Even I know, it's need time to cure. to forget, to accept. But just thing happened in a sudden, I have no ready to accept this... There are too many regret and sorrows left.... Rest IN peace, this is my hope for her, forever. And Be strong and tough, this is what i hope for myself. I'll never forget you, granny.

RIP

止不住的思念，我知道 在另一边的世界，婆婆希望我活得好好的。 我不哭，我需要坚强。

ENding

You tried to retain me, pursue me don't leave....
but, life goes on, i'm not doing charity. SOrry.

You hurt me, and thanks for the harsh and cruel. I will quit.

Thank you, for everything.

写实的现实

会有一天，我不再热衷于找你讨论任何芝麻绿豆的小事，定期地与你聊天，天南地北地谈经济谈女人谈工作。
这么的一天，一点一点地在累积，长期地不忿与委屈，把我之前对你的那份热衷与热心全然抹去。。。
当有一天，你前来向我倾述你的问题，老生常谈，道出你的生活的一切，
我会回以一句， “哦，是吗？”
对你仅有的亲近感也断然无存，
哥儿们的袍澤之情，更是甭说了
这会是一件好事
我可以出言拒绝你所有的要求，不再是义务，更不会因为你的一些困难而赴汤蹈火舍命陪君子
渐渐地，发现了生活圈子的不同，对事物的概念与理念兼有不同地执着
没有后悔，没有不值得
只是遗憾
开心的是，至少在一路上，我照明了你的道路，开拓了你的事业与视野
这一天，最后发现了
对，最重要的
还是自己

day 4

cried without tears.
problems still there.
where is the ending?

Day 3

Day 3, same thing happended still. 2 weeks needed for observation. I will bear for it...

I need to be strong and independent.

"it's pointless being together if always arguing...."

This is what i suppose to receive now?

With this situation and condition, i give up...

Good bye.

helpless

Life never easy as what we always get to knew from the TV shows and dramas.
Obstacles surrounding with burden of constrains will be limit your life.
Money is the most important things i found out for the current stage.
Even with the master graduated degree, but yet I am still suffered with the budget constrains all the times....
Can't work with the job i desired with, struggle with my health else now....

2 weeks observation, as after the consultation by Dr. huh, I need worry for the another two weeks....

2012 seems too bad for me, i lost appreciation from others, lost respect and lost even money, and with a lousy job.

Lord, are u listen to me?

边缘

说不寂寞是假的，
有时在这城市里，
一个人地遛达，
心里也满不是滋味

一个人也几年了，
也许习惯了，
但在累的时候
还是想
有个人
能在家
等着我回去

不是爱挑剔
只是
很多时候
爱来得真的不是时候

you will never know how disappointed i am now....
Been humiliated but yet forgive, yet need to faced a huge insult like this....
Helpless, definitely it was very helpeless, but what to do?
No one can giving their hand and i'm the only one have to face it.

开心，吗？

现在，我只能在远远地
观望着你，关心你。
从来没想过
我们的关系会变得那么地糟糕
明白了
经过了数周的时间
明白了
尽管有千万个理由想要和你和好如初
但你的一个理由
足以把我给打倒
一段以逝的感情
确实很难再收回
最重要
你开心
就好

forget the pass, and move forward

Just met a knowledgeable and experienced person yesterday in my previous job office.
We have a long chat and yet for the 2 hours, what he told me was totally impressed me.

something BIG BIG BIG were across my mind in this two days and all it's about the career and personal development.
Many of the things he been told me that it never come across to my mind before,
A job can earned up to RM15k per month after few years which is can be get from my expertise.
Definitely it's was so amazing and shocked me cause I never ever think that can make money with such level!
Impressed me, and made me felt,
I'm rather dim about the purposes of my lives before.

What kind of life I've been gone through?
I live my life for others, sacrifice everything for other, and do nothing for myself...
When is the time i request for some rewards, "calculative", "childish" and "emotional" & etc stamped on me.

Give more, expect less...
I did applied it but things come different to me.

Times to say goodbye to "Tiny Me" and say hi to "Big Me" on 2012!